Sadly I have come home to this too many times and I'm pretty sure the dog was thinking the same thing

LOL Tuesday

One of my new years resolutions was to laugh hysterically (in a good way, not in the way I laugh after reading Drudge Report) once a day.  So every morning I go to pintrest which always has some hilarious stuff on it. 

My poor husband had to get used to periodic streams of uncontrolled giggling coming from the computer room.  He found it slightly unnerving at first! Laughter truly is the best medicine.

Cats vs. Dogs thoughts when you come home

Military Bumper Stickers I've Read

BUMPER STICKERS .......

" U.S. Marines - Certified Counselors to the 72 Virgins Dating Club."

" U.S. Air Force - Travel Agents To Allah"

"Stop Global Whining"

"When In Doubt, Empty The Magazine"

Naval Corollary: Dead Men Don't Testify

"The Marine Corps - When It Absolutely, Positively Has To Be Destroyed
Overnight"

"Death Smiles At Everyone - Marines Smile Back"

"Marine Sniper - You can run, but you'll just die tired!"

"What Do I Feel When I Kill A Terrorist? A Little Recoil"

"Marines - Providing Enemies of America an Opportunity To Die For
their Country Since 1775"

"Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Anyone Who Threatens It"

"Happiness Is A Belt-Fed Weapon"

"It's God's Job to Forgive Bin Laden - It's Our Job To Arrange The
Meeting"

"Artillery Brings Dignity to What Would Otherwise Be Just A Vulgar
Brawl"

"One Shot,Twelve Kills - U.S. Naval Gun Fire Support"

"My Kid Fought In Iraq So Your Kid Can Party In College"

"Machine Gunners - Accuracy By Volume"

"A Dead Enemy Is A Peaceful Enemy - Blessed Be The Peacemakers"


"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they made a
difference in the world.

But the U.S. ARMED FORCES don't have that problem."...Ronald Reagan

Are you ready for a Zombie Apocalypse? If not the CDC has a handy guide for you to follow!

This one got me laughing!  Who says people in government have no sense of humor?

http://www.foxnews.com/health/2011/05/18/cdc-warns-public-prepare-zombie-apocalypse/?test=latestnews

Funny Jokes

I found these while looking for a joke I once read.  Its on a site with all farming or country jokes
 
http://www.retrojunkie.com/jokes/farming.htm
 
Political Science for Dummies
 
 
DEMOCRATIC
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbara Streisand sings for you.
 
REPUBLICAN
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?
 
SOCIALIST
You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST
You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.
 
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
 
BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.
 
AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.
 
FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.
 
JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.
 
GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.
 
ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.
 
BELGIAN CORPORATION
You have one cow.
The cow is schizophrenic.
Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.
The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
The cow dies happy

One of my personal favorites is as follows, because farming can sometimes be a loosing bet.  And you do it because you love it.

As the farmer who won the lottery said when asked what he was going to do with his winnings,
"Keep farming until it's all gone.”

A Joke to Brighten Your Day

This one had me laughing out loud so I thought I'd pass it on.  I read it in Country Magazine, one of my favorite mags.

In a trial, a small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly woman, to the stand.  As he approached her, he asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

"Yes, Mr. Williams, I know you," she replied.  "I've known you since you were a boy and, frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me.  You lie, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think your a big shot, but you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher."

The lawyer was stunned.  Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

"Yes, I do," she replied.  "I've know Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too.  He's lazy and bigoted.  He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the state."

The judge asked both attorneys to approach the bench.  In a very quiet voice he said,  "If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair."