Friday, January 25, 2013

Hamsters Are Evil

I want to alert my innocent readers to a very real danger.  It's one few people know about but I tell you it is real.

That being... Hamsters

Do not be fooled by their cute exterior. I

Inside lurks the mind of a remorseless maniac as you can see from the pick below.

My kind of hampster

When I was young I too was hoodwinked by their fuzzy marsh mellow  exterior.  I would gaze at them through the pet store window and think how cute and ooh and aah.  I never saw the looks of fear and loathing the pet shop workers were shooting at the adorable fuzzballs.

I first became aware of the hamster threat at my job working in a pet shop.  I was warned on day one never to try and pick them up without gloves, and when a customer made a purchase it fell to the newest hire to get them.  I soon learned to fear the hamster.  They are insanely aggressive and will attack anyone foolish enough to invade their glass tank jumping and biting at the intruding hand.  We would warn unknowing parents of vulnerable children to not buy a hamster unless they didn't like their child.  

More Hampsters than I can count O.O

Google Image Result for http://dinaruns.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Cute_Hampster_thumb.png

you may think he's cute but did you know he is training for special warfare?

In fact Hamsters are so aggressive you cannot mix males and females because the females will kill the males.  One time a new hire mixed a shipment of hamster together and the next day we opened the shop and found 20 hamsters dead.  I imagine it must have been like a hamster version of Thunder dome. 

Twenty hamsters enter, one hamster leaves.

I wuv Hampsters

You may be under surveillance as we speak 

Also Hamsters were the only animals we had that routinely ate their young.  Charming right?

LOOK AT THE ADORABLE HAMPSTER

So readers DO NOT BE FOOLED!  These creatures are out for blood.... YOUR blood!





2 comments:

  1. LOL! We have a hamster and she spends her every waking moment trying to break out of her cage. We think she's gone crazy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. What you dont know Lisa is that your hampster is plotting to get you. Do not let her out!

    ReplyDelete

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